And lo, I have earned myself the uncoveted reputation of being an alpha grouch, a killjoy prime, a Don Buzzkill of all things Internet — and it’s high time to cement the title as my middle name.
Now, these are; Plurk updates I keep seeing all the time.
- These templates are not good.
- These templates are not bad.
- My own account is not immune to these templates.
- May or may not be applicable for Twitter (and Facebook — sora9n).
- Written in a certain foreign language for extra oomph.
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6. To be a rock / And not to roll
abud31 Wiiiild horseees… Couldn’t draaag me awaaaaay (music)
What it is: A piece of quoted lyrics straight out of a pop composition. Bonus points if Japanese. Obligatory: “headphone” emoticon.
Responses: 1) People guessing what it is, 2) people putting up the missing bits.
Level of interest to an average person: Zeroh.
5. Sharing is Caring
budi_cullen [shares] dual screen e-readers get lukewarm reviews (thinking) comments?
What it is: Links to something else in the cyberspace. Flavours include current news, YouTube, or images. Image macros are common subjects. Bonus points if it’s an editorial posted so the poster can point and laugh.
Level of interest to an average person: Very high.
4. Hey look Mama I’m quotable
cokigembul [thinks] Love is a journey, a decision. (thinking)
What it is: Often self-righteous quips (or “quips”) by the esteemed Zen Master that is Yours Truly. That it is written in English is almost obligatory. Bonus points if it’s blatanly about romance. Should the poster actually put his name at the end it usually gets very campy. The romance subgenre is a staple of your standard Internet Casanova.
Responses: 1) People agreeing 2) people trying to find holes in the argument.
Level of interest to an average person: A niche.
dancing.gal.1990 [says] it hurts…
Or something like that. Painful to emulate.
What it is: Catharsis. The type that may or may not be embarassing if opened two years later. You know the kind.
Responses: “Cozy” emoticons.
Level of interest to an average person: To complete outsiders, the lowest possible. To friends, may be much higher.
ebertroger [says] holy crap i haven’t plurked since liek two days ago look at my karma
What it is: Plurking about plurking. People posting about their karma levels, their plurking trends, or to proclaim to the Universe that they are going to bed soon and would circulate their personal details no more for the remainder of the day.
Responses: Random, nonchalant comments.
Level of interest to an average person: None, seriously none.
1. Keluh Kesah
foobar3000 [was] downloading some porn and the connection went off!!! x-(
What it is: People moaning about anything and everything. Users are somehow more interested in documenting the shittier parts of their lives, as observed observantly by our most observant observer, Mas Joe. This practice is so widespread it is difficult to imagine a timeline screencap without at least one of them scattered in the background.
Level of interest to an average person: Varies.
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And why yes, I have considerately omitted the “worst offender” section!